Saturday, August 9, 2008

Saluting the Olympics

Once every four years, the best athletes the world has to offer come together for three weeks of harmony and cutthroat competition. As a patriotic American sports fan, I feel it is my duty to pay tribute to the the hard working men and women currently representing our country in Beijing. The problem is that there are over 500 athletes representing the U.S., so I can't possibly thank them all individually here in the limited space of this blog. Perhaps I can have one person to serve as a surrogate for all U.S. athletes. But who to choose? Should I select a well-known professional athlete such as basketball team member Kobe Bryant? Or an unkown such as badminton (seriously?!) player Mesinee Mangkalakiri (who apparently is so unkown that the official U.S. Olympic Team website doesn't even have a picture of her). Obviously with so many choices, the fairest thing to do is employ a totally random selection process to select an athlete to carry my thanks to the rest of the team.

And so, without further ado, the totally randomly selected athlete is.....beach vollyball player Misty May-Treanor! I salute you Misty for representing our country against the best beach volleyball players those damn foreigners can come up with. I salute you for the intensive training you endure, and your dedication to a vocation where you must wear swimsuits every day. As part of my support, I promise to follow your progress in Beijing very closely. I will salute you by watching every match, perhaps even TIVOing them so I can salute you over and over again. I may even salute your partner, Kerri Walsh, once or twice.

So thank you Misty May-Treanor. You make me proud to be an American.

Misty May-Treanor - American Patriot

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